Going from Tomboy to Transman

Disclaimer: This article contains language that some transgender individuals may find triggering. I am writing this from my personal experience, and I do not speak for the entire transgender community.

As far back as I can remember, around the age of three or so, I’ve viewed myself as male. I couldn’t understand when my grandmother tried to explain that I wasn’t a boy, until I accidentally walked in on one going to the bathroom. However, even faced with that fact, I still preferred wearing boy’s clothes and keeping my hair short. Knowing how disappointed I was, my grandmother allowed it, although she kept trying to get me to wear skirts and blouses with big flouncy bows for special occasions. (I hated those bows!)

Transitioning was not a widely known option when I was younger. I had no choice but to shove myself into being female and ultimately embracing the identity of being a tomboy. I don’t even recall how old I was when I first heard the term, but from my perspective it fit well enough, however imperfectly.

As I grew older, I didn’t always present myself as butch. On occasion I did enjoy growing my hair long. I never was a big fan of wearing dresses or skirts, but sometimes they were fun. I learned to wear minimal makeup because when I didn’t, I’d get concerned questions regarding my health (as many women do).