Transgender Men Forgotten in the Bathroom Debate

Grayson Bell
4 min readJan 10, 2020
Photo by Tom Rogerson on Unsplash

For several years now, the debate about whether transgender women have the right to use public women’s bathrooms has raged on. However, when people argue so vehemently for transgender women to use the bathroom that matches their birth sex, they often completely ignore the existence of transgender men.

Transgender Men Exist, Too!

While everyone is freaking out about transgender women invading women’s spaces, as if they were some kind of collective predator, they all but ignore the existence of transgender men. Why? They view us the same way they view our transgender sisters, as our biological birth sex, rather than by the gender we identify and present as. Since they view transgender men as merely confused women, we don’t seem like a threat to them. If we try to change that perception, that’s when we are liable to be attacked or even murdered.

Some days it feels as if the only way for transgender people to be truly safe in our current society is to pass and keep our mouths shut. As long as we look the right way, act the right way, and conform to all those outdated gender stereotypes that feminists are always railing against, then maybe we stand a chance of passing. Our detractors would be happy for us to melt back into the woodwork, keeping to ourselves and keeping quiet.

They’d be even happier if we just admitted that we’re all sick in the head. If we would just spend more time in therapy — or better yet conversion therapy — we’d see the error of our ways and embrace our biological sex. Then we can be as gender non-conforming as we want, as long as we don’t try to pretend that our gender is the opposite of our birth sex.

It’s this shortsighted attitude that has kept a lot of transgender people closeted or stealth for millennia. However, enough of us are tired of hiding. We are tired of trying to either be miserable in our own skins or transitioning and living in fear of being found out.

Are Transgender Men Safe in Men’s Bathrooms?

Would a transgender man be safe using the men’s bathroom? What if he’s in a state where it’s technically illegal for him to do so? Should he risk it anyway?

Grayson Bell

An autistic, gay, transgender man writing about LGBTQ issues, focused on the transgender community. (He/Him) http://graysonbell.net/